I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
Hotel room at 3 am. She's 42. Stockings and heels. All because I opened with a joke about cougar hunting. We'll high-five later.
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.