no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
The cops high fived after they tackled you
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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