I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
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