i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Randomize
