Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
Randomize
