i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
Note to self. Never fart in a tanning bed
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
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