i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Randomize
