you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
Randomize
