She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
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