I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
Randomize
