I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
Success! We fucked roommates!
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
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