I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
Randomize
