I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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