look no pants
Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
