I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
Randomize
