hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
Randomize