I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
