If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
did i just pee glitter
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
Randomize
