Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
Randomize