can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
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