My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
