i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
Randomize