i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
Randomize