Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
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