How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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