i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
