No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
Randomize