I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
Randomize
