honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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