return my video game
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize