idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
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