i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
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