Grow some girl-balls and come out already
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
Randomize
