where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
Randomize