I made out with a fat chick last night in a hot tub... btw I am breaking up with you
I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
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