it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
porn star boner night. come get it.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize
