Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
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