she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
God I need to hump something, right now.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Randomize
