I just woke up in my car with half the wedding cake next to me. This will not end well.
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
What kind of true American would I be if I didn't just smoke weed in my bathrobe on my back porch in the middle of suburbia on 4/20? #stepmomoftheyear
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
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