I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
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