You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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