I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
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