I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
Randomize