He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
