why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
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