i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Randomize