Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
Fuck appropriateness.
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She swung at the pinata with crutches
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
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