there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
All the doctor said was why
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
Randomize
