thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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