Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
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He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
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PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
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