bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
Randomize
